jim and abby's luau

So this past saturday was the big luau at Jim and Abby's house. MAN was it awesome! They had SO much food and SO many fun people there. It was a big crowd, and I had a great time. I brought a whole bunch of fruit over and made a giant fruit platter for the party, which was a blast. I wish I had shopped a little earlier, since some of the fruit wasn't quite ripe yet.

So, basically, a pretty rockin weekend. Back to work tomorrow... hopefully I can make myself get back onto a normal sleep schedule again, since I slept pretty much all day today.

ink explanation

So, to clarify, for those of you who couldn't see it right off the bat, the ambigram in my new tattoo is "Courage" when read from the left, and "Strength" when read from the right. (You have to turn your head to see it in the picture below.)

new ink!!!

Oh man... this took a three hour session with Mason Williams at Permanent Productions, but it was SO completely and totally worth it. The detail and quality of the work is just amazing. I'm just blown away. Mason was so great, and took into account everything I asked for. It's just amazing, and I couldn't be happier.

The text is an Ambigram by Mark Palmer at WoW Tattoos (www.wowtattoos.com) and the barbed wire accent, as well as the inking itself, is by Mason Williams at Permanent Productions (www.mikedorsey.com).

website, haircut, tattoo, oh my!

I finally have a real website at sillypanda.net. You can still get directly to my blog by going to blog.sillypanda.net but if you're here, then you already know that, most likely.

I also just got my hair cut, in kind of a new look for me. I like it a lot. See my facebook profile for a look at it.

Also... the tattoo artist I've been trying to get an appointment with had a cancellation tomorrow, so I'm gonna go get my new tattoo TOMORROW!! I'm so excited, I did NOT expect him to be available so soon, but I'm totally geeked for it. I'll post pics tomorrow night.

updated url

If you're reading this post, then you either subscribe via RSS, read the RSS feed on facebook, or have figured out the new url for my blog. I'm in the process of setting up my personal site at sillypanda.net, so the blog will now be hosted at blog.sillypanda.net.

So, more news as details develop.

this week's house

In all the time that I've been following various tv shows, I've never actually cried because of something on tv. I've just never become so attached to a character that I was able to feel that.

Tonight on House, I cried when Wilson cried. I've never felt such a kindred spirit as I do with him. I won't post any spoilers here, at least not this early in the week, cause I want everyone who watches it to experience it first-hand.

I more just wanted to write about how I've been living such a dual life these past few weeks. In some ways, my life feels full and amazing, and in other ways, I feel empty and alone in this huge, empty world. Tonight I watched that episode of House and I haven't been able to stop crying. I feel almost sick with depression, and I shouldn't. I had such a great weekend with my family... but I still feel so... alone and sad.

I hope things get better soon.

iron man

Saw Iron Man last night. It was freakin AWESOME!! Robert Downey Jr was a great pick to play that role... I was actually impressed. I was also surprised at how similar they made his voice in the suit sound to Master Chief from the first Halo. I wanna check into that...

Anyway... time for lunch. Gotta run!

oh yeah

oh yeah...

...and in case you missed it, 5.13 was my birthday. I'm 24 now.

Weird.

and now for something completely different

For those of you who just can't get enough panda-related nonsense in your lives, I have a very special offer for you.

Starting right now, you can get your very own sillypanda.net email address. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! Thanks to the magic (and freedomness) of Google Apps, I can now offer you a sillypanda.net email address (any username of your choosing) and you get the supreme awesome functionality of GMAIL with your new email account! YES!! You read that right - your very own sillypanda.net GMAIL account! What could be better?

Well... lots of things. But let's not go there right now.

Anyway, if you're interested, just drop me a line or comment on this post.

done forever

Rachel broke up with me on aim tonight. I don't get it. I thought we were doing ok, but then she wanted to take a break for a bit, and then that turned into not being together, and now it turned into she can't be with me for this big long list of reasons, but basically it boils down to she doesn't want to be with me anymore.

And yeah, she says she loves me, and it kills her to leave me and throw all of this away, and she doesn't want to be replaced, and wants us to still be friends, but I'm the one sitting here in the living room of a hotel suite in tampa, trying not to cry too loud because I don't want to wake up Jim in the next room.

This is the last time. I can't feel like this again. Goodbye, Rachel. You will always have the pieces of my heart and soul that you stole from me tonight.

shrug

I'm not doing so well these days. I hardly see Rachel anymore, and work has been really busy. I love coming home to Yoko, though. She's so sweet, and always happy to see me.

I've got a new doctor here in kentucky, and I think I'm gonna talk to him about getting my dose of zoloft increased, and see if that helps. I just wanna feel numb to all these sad feelings I get. It's starting to get in the way of work again. I miss having friends living with me, at least then I saw other people once in a while.

Maybe being in the sun in tampa this week will help.

Also, sorry for not updating for so long. Things have been really weird for me lately, and I haven't felt like doing anything. You haven't missed much, but I know some of you worry about me when you don't hear from me for a while, and I haven't been online or anything. So, sorry for that. Hopefully I'll get back to posting on a regular basis.